Thursday, February 5, 2009

Alone

Do you know what its like to be all alone? Some people say they do and they play along. But they don't know what its like to really be all alone. They say they do, but they don't know alone. I don't mean alone like losing a girl or a friend. And I don't mean depressed wishing for your life to end. Truth is, these eries are SEEN by others eyes. Some say sadness is just a part of life. So they'll pat your back and say it'll be alright. See, sadness, people can relate to. But what do you do when nobody can relate to you? And I don't mean the teen, "Nobody understands me"

I mean bein the gleam in their eyes, so bright that your very existence is considered right - a miracle of God. Like where you've got a job that's so hard to get that even mentioning it makes you the shit. And even though you love what you do, it makes you miserable cause its stuff nobody can relate to. So you make a hobby outta talkin to yourself. Can't nobody understand your questions so you answerin em for yourself. Its nowhere to go for help, nobody to talk to. There are people who did it before, but even they confused. They provide advice, but they're worried about the problems in their own life.

Its a road only paved for the few, and I've still got some pavin left to do. Picture that childhood dream that seems impossible to pursue, so most just dream different, set their goals on what they know they can accomplish, only to later in their mid-life crisis, wonder if they coulda accomplished this. But I heard about the struggle and still took the hard road - ignored the naysayers tryin to add to my load. It got to the point where I could see the dream clearly, and right there in the center was me smiling happy. But now when I look up, I aint seein the same stuff. That picture done changed to the point where I don't know what's up. And that's the part of the hard road that wasn't in the brochure. Nobody explained that there'd be NOBODY next to you. I never knew there'd be nobody to talk to, nobody to ask whats goin on. So I sit alone.

2 comments:

Wings said...

I think I'm feeling this one the most right now, because I feel like I can really relate. For me, this school thing has been a big sacrifice. I have lost friends, and I hardly see my family. People who I have known and loved my whole life, suddenly seem so different. Like a world apart. Suddenly, I can't relate to my own family anymore. I can't talk to them about what I do, cause they don't understand,or they just don't want to hear about it. They just know that what I do is good, and they are proud. And that makes me glad, but it also makes me sad. It is not enough. And I feel alone a lot. So, if you ever find yourself alone...I'll gladly pull up a chair right beside you;)

Anonymous said...

I thought I was the only one. For me I have school and work. Everyone is envious of achievements that leave me unfulfilled. My family can't relate, my friends think everything is gravy are are more annoyed, than concerned with my uneasiness. I have no one to talk to about anything. I have unintentionally distanced myself from family and friends, because being around them makes me feel even more alone. Alone in my thoughts, fears, problems, and successes. I can relate.

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